Arsenic Lullaby The Big Stall
I don’t know that there has ever been a more appropriately named book in the history of books.
I named it that, coyly ,because allot of the material was stuff Mad thought was too harsh, and things I was coming up with that I knew full well were to harsh for anyone but A.L. readers. Also I have been trying to get a cartoon off the ground and so comic book stories in this book by and large where things that were too good not to see print even though I am trying to do things outside of comics.
I didn’t name it that because I would have to stall for months on end for one problem or another after…but the title fits none the less.
Here is the fun squeeze of being an independent publisher. You are spending enough money on printing to get a good printer, but not really enough to get them to give you top priority if something goes wrong. If there is a misprint or something was sized wrong or the colors are off and it is their fault…they will solve the problem…but you get to go to the back of the line each time because A-they have your money B-the corrections are costing THEM not you and C- there are other books waiting for them to print that are profit and not a redo.
So…here I sit, and wait for the book to finally finish and look like a jackass. It happens from time to time. the stars align and everything that could go wrong does go wrong and you look like a jackass. This usually happens when the whole world is watching or it is a pivotal point in your career. I remember issue no.9 of Arsenic Lullaby went off without a hitch, and looked better than I had hoped (experimented with different paper on the cover) and was finished in two weeks…I remember that. I remember because it happened on an issue that wasn’t special in any way shape or form as far as the world, my career, or the time of year (mid fall) was concerned. It wasn’t special in any way, there was no particularly time sensitive story or convention it needed to be published in time for. It really could have been three months late and no one would have noticed. But it was done fast and looked great and there were no problems…The X-mass special, a couple months, later had a tight deadline and everything went to hell and it was finished a day before the distributor needed it and I had to literally drive it 16 hours to the distribution warehouse myself.
I tell you this
A-because you are wondering where your books are
B- to let you know that NO ONE is more anxious for this to all get wrapped up than me.
So, how much of it is my fault? Oh…about 75% in the sense of I have the personality where in …the longer it takes the more I hyper focus on things to make sure it is worth the wait…thereby noticing things that don’t cut the mustard. Some of them vital, like say…blood that looks orange..40% x-mas stories in a book that comes out after x-mass..and some that any normal human being would give a pass, like say…making sure the name of a canning jar that a fairy is captive in has a vintage canning company name on it. You find yourself saying “well…the f*ckers at the back of the line anyway…might as well touch up this or that”. Anyone who thinks I have been sitting out the couch watch cartoons all this time should find some sweet revenge in know that along with other very important things I have been doing ( which I own to you but will not mention..YET)I have been driving myself insane reworking and essentially staring at the same book for months on end…completely stressed out.
I have been on both sides of the “you’re an asshole” paradime. The one pointing and calling the name and the one being pointed at. YOU are waiting for a book and possibly annoyed that it is taking so long…I am the guy in charge. You are annoyed at one person…I am person who is annoyed with by several hundred.
Both sides suck, but both sides have their advantages. You are annoyed but have the comfort of righteous indignation. I am the focus of your ire but have a trump card…I know what the book looks like…and it’s really really good. Really good.
As anyone who has ordered anything from us in the past and had it be late knows…there is anyways an extra added to make up for the delay. So…long and short, it’s almost about to ship (yes, I know…you have heard that already) AND it will be worth the wait.