You call this a brush?! (explicit language warning)

On April 22, 2017 by admin

This is the kind of inking I do (below).  It’s delicate work.  You need the right tool for the job. For this I used a Windsor Newton series 7 no.0 (for every single line). I was very specific on what brush, because I use a very specific brush.  The series 7 is the best quality genuine sable hair, the size is just right for curved lines and straight lines. It can leave a line as tiny as a scanner is capable of seeing and as thick as a sharpie mark.

I got a brand new Windsor Newton series 7 no.0 brush, and I noticed the logo didn’t look as good. And I was going to go on about it. About how once you let the small details slide, it’s a slippery slope to the whole thing being crap.  And I was going to apply that to an Illustration…and how focusing on little details that might not be noticed is important because it keeps you focused..keeps you at a high level.  And I didn’t….Because f*cking Joe told me I sounded insane.

“sure write whole blog about how the logo on the handle of a brush looks different…sound like you’ve lost you mind..go right ahead” he said.

So, I didn’t.  And guess what…THE BRUSH IS SHIT.  IT’S SHIT!

I fucking knew it would be shit. I FUCKING KNEW IT, JOE.  Everyone, Look at that logo.

You see it? You see the problem?….don’t look at me…LOOK AT THE BUSHES.

SEE?!  …oh for the love a…

HERE…

See how the griffin in the good one has nice defined detail in the wings and the other on is a blob of gold paint…or the nice delicate font on the good one compared to the boring blocky font? and why the FUCK is the zero sideways now?

…I’m not crazy, this is not OCD.  This is about quality and craftsmanship.

This is supposed to be the best brand of brush their is…if you went to buy a Mercedes and you saw the hood ornament was on crooked and warped…you’d know it was made at 4:59 on a Friday and was probably put together like crap.

And that’s what I knew as soon as I saw this brush…I FUCKING KNEW IT.

It has about as much flex as a morning boner. It either won’t hold enough ink or it sucks up too much ink in a big unusable GLOB.  It won’t hold a point.  That’s a number ZERO…you know why I use such a small bush?  Because I want a FINE POINT…YOU COCKSUCKERS AT WINDSOR NEWTON.  That’s why I pay WAY TOO MUCH FOR YOUR BRUSH.  For A FINE POINT.

This piece of SHIT either comes to a knife edge (flat point, as opposed to a round point…like a pencil. This is important in curved line because if it always has a knife edge you can’t make the line width consistent on a curve…it always has a calligraphic change in thickness.) OR…and this is super fun…it just splits.  It looks like a forked tongue so every line I ink is a double line so that the reader thinks they are drunk…or I was drunk.  I can still ink while drunk by the way…but not with this turd on a stick.

No flex, no point…and after just a few minutes it curls up like an elf’s shoe.  Using this is like trying to push a noodle through a button hole.  It’s like trying to fuck with your dick sideways. It’s like trying to go down on someone with your tongue glued to your upper lip. It’d be like being in the missionary position without any legs.

These are supposed to be the best brushes their are. That hunk of crap costs between 15-20 dollars.  That these cunts have the nerve to charge that much at all is sick.  But to charge that much and not give a flying fuck if it’s any good is egregious.

20.00…for what…75-100 strands of hair glued to a stick?! Fucking thieves.  How much is gold per ounce? Like 1000.00?  It would take like the equivalent of 500 portions of this brush hair to equal one ounce.  that’s 2000.00 an ounce! GOLD IS 50% CHEAPER THAN THIS FUCKING BRUSH HAIR.

Why? because it’s an art supply and all art supplies are over priced because all art suppliers are the fucking quivelant of meth dealers.  They know you have some urge wired into your brain to do this and so they know you are compelled to do it and so you going to pay…and there isn’t enough competition so they can set whatever bullshit price they want.  They just fucking make it up. They MAKE IT UP.  Show me the fucking formula of logistics, production, and standard percentage for profit margin, where 75 hairs on a stick comes to TWENTY FUCKING DOLLARS.  THEY MADE IT UP. You wanna know the formula…it’s probably 1.00 cheaper that some standard amount of pot an artist might spend money on instead.  That’s why it’s cheaper for students (student discount..more on that in a minute), they might be able to split the once or kilo…or whatever the fuck measurement you buy pot by…don’t ask me, I have to save my money for animal hair on a stick.

I’m sure some of the reason for the cost is that is has to be imported, because for some fucking reason a sable is the only animal we don’t grow in this country by the millions in tiny little boxes and regularly inject with hormones to grow them bigger…WHY NOT?! It’s a mammal, we can eat it. I’ll fucking eat one right now. I’ll bite the head off it like Ozzy Osborne. McDonalds…how about it? Sable Nuggets?  I’ll eat them everyday if it brings the cost of these brushes down, or just call them chicken nuggets, we don’t believe there’s real chicken in there anyways.

A Sable is basically a mink.  I looked online. A FULL LENGTH MINK COAT at MACY’S s only 5000.00. Do you realize how many no.0 brushes you could make out of one? I held my brush up to a ruler…it 1/16th wide.  That means you could get 256 brushes out of ONE SQUARE INCHE OF MINK COAT….that is 5120.00 PER SQUARE INCHE!!!! It COSTS AS MUCH FOR ONE SQUARE INCH OF THIS HAIR ON A BRUSH AS AN ENTIRE MINK COAT FROM MACY’S…

WHAT THE FUCK?!

Even IF I got a student discount it’d still be over 15.00.  And I don’t get one. I don’t get JACK SHIT…because I’m not a “student”.  Why the fuck do they get a discount?  Fuck them, they’re going to be 100,00.00 in student loan debt once they are out of school anyways. They ain’t going to have the time or money to sniff at another Windsor Newton brush so what’s the benefit to Windsor Newton to give THEM a discount?  I…have people come to me for advice on what art supplies to buy, I…have a you tube channel where I mentioned this company on an inking video that has like 40,000 views.   What do I get? I get a 20.00 brush that looks like a dollar store broom.

And the days of me being able to pass myself off as a college student and bluff my way to getting a discount are long gone.  They are as long gone as the days I could date a college student and not get a bunch of disapproving looks…hey…F*ck you pal, women my age are just as crazy and they can’t buy me brushes for 20% off, but if it makes you feel any better, I’m gonna break up with this broad once I stock up on overpriced brushes…or she gets pregnant.  I don’t have money for an abortion, much less a child…I’m getting dinged for 20.00 every time I need a new brush.  Now, mind your own business or the next 20 year old I bring in here is going to be your daughter, and you can bet your ass I’m going to take my pent up frustration, from trying to get this hunk of shit brush to make a decent line, out on her gentle frame…in the back of the car your car. And I’m going to make her yell “Windsor Newton Sucks” while we’re doing it.

The big picture problem is that Windsor Newton Brushes have been going downhill for years now.  I’m not the only one who’s noticed.   I started using Raphael brand brushes…but they are too long.  The hair/brush portion is a good 1/4 inch longer.  Which means too much flex, and less overall control, and less line thickness control on the curved lines.  Windsor Newton is just right, right size, right length…too bad it can’t hold a fucking  point, or soak up ink properly.

It’s not easy to find these fucking things either, because no stores around here carry them. So I have to order them online…and wait a week for a brush to show up shaped like a penis with peyronie’s disease.

FUCK! I have FUCKING WORK TO DO.  And what do I have to do it with? A brush that might as well be made out of silly string.

I know it seems odd for me to be ranting for an entire blog about a brush…but I need to use a brush to work…for a living…and it doesn’t work.  I have to get this stuff inked and the tool I use is fighting me every step of the way. Imagine if you were a cashier and every time you looked at the register the number keys where in a different random order.

These Cocksuckers…I’m writing them a letter…oh yeah.  You know how to know when you are too old to date 20 year olds?  It’s when you write complaint letters to companies.

Fuck it. These shitbags are ruining my fucking life. I have spent 15 years and like 20,000 man hours learning how to use their specific bush and they can’t even make sure the fucking hairs a re glued in right? FUCK THEM.

Here comes a letter you cunts, you cocksucking, lack of quality control having motherless jerk offs…

To whom it may concern,
I am writing to you about the overall decline in quality I have noticed of your series 7 brushes.  Let me start by telling you that I have been a professional illustrator for 15 years and have worked for many national and international comic books and magazines.  I mention this only the impress upon you the credibility of my  assessment.  I know very well how to use a brush, care for a brush, and the difference between a quality brush and a shoddily produced brush.
I purchase more than a few Windsor Newton series 7 no.0 brushes over the course of a year and while getting one that was poorly made used to be a rare occurrence, now it happens more often than it does not. The sub-standard quality persists. whether I purchase your brushes online, or from any of several local art supply stores.
The most recent Series 7 no.0 brush that I purchased was extremely poor quality to the point of being unusable. The brush itself was unevenly trimmed to such an extent that it would not hold together while making a curve, but rather split apart like an old broom. It would not keep a consistent point, but rather get a knife edge after just a few strokes, and begin to keep an upward curl after a few more. After one single use the brush developed a split down the point/hair of the brush, like a forked tongue. These are things that I used to see develop after several full illustration assignments, not after one single use.
I would have in the past said “I expect more from a Windsor Newton brush”. Sadly that is no longer the case.  As of late, I find it to be as likely a Windsor Newton brush is rubbish as it is likely to be of the quality that Series 7 used to be known for.
I am not looking for a refund from the store, nor from you.  I am merely letting you know that the quality of the Series 7 brush is now below the level of brushes made by other companies.  The next Windsor Newton brush I purchase that is so poorly crafted, will be the last I purchase.  It will, as well, be the last time I recommend your brushes to others in my industry, students, or followers on my various social media platforms…including my you-tube channel where my video on inking currently has over 40,000 views.
 I am often asked about the supplies I use, by fans, students,and other professionals. I used to recommend Windsor Newton without hesitation. However, as I say, one more brush of such poor quality and I will not only cease to use or even recommend your brushes, I will be searching out and recommending a brush from another company that holds the quality of their product in higher priority.
Sincerely
Douglas Paszkiewicz
P.S. Below is a link to my online portfolio and resume, should the weight of my opinion be in question.

http://www.arseniclullabies.com/proport.html

There…take THAT, you cunts.

YOU CUUUNNNNTSSSS!


When Douglas is not complaining he and his work can be found here

www.arseniclullabies.com

His work is very good…because he’s insane.

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