The Milwaukee paradox

**This weeks comics are below the blog**

First, a quick plug here for Dr. No's comic shop in Georgia. Seems some idiot drove into the power lines or something and took out the power for the store and it might be several weeks before its restored, because of red tape involving permits or some sh*t.

As you can imagine 3 weeks before Xmas is not a great time for a small business to not have any power. The owners are keeping the store open during daylight hours and have mobile apps for taking credit cards, and giving it hell as best they can.

(click logo for Dr.No's website/address)

 Cliff who co-runs Dr.No's was real good to me when I first started, and I don't forget such things, SO...if you are in that area, drop in, buy some comics. I know a lot of you here aren't necessarily comic book people and, aside from Arsenic Lullaby, wouldn't know what to even look for. I'll give you three recommendations that I'm pretty sure they'd have, that are not typical lame ass super hero books.

-If you saw any of the Hellboy movies...that there is the comic it was based on. The comic leans more into weird creepy horror than the action based movie. Mignola is the original guy, other took over after him...those collections might be great, but I havent read them so I can't vouch for them. But any of the one's Mignola is listed as writer/artist on are good.

-If you saw the movie Sin City, this is the comic that was based on. The comic and movie are about as close as two versions of something can be. It's a groundbreaking comic that's worth reading.

-If you've watched the cartoon Invader Zimm...Jhonen is the guy who created that and before doing so he did the comic Squee. One of my favorites.

***every other pro reading this, don't get salty at me for not recommending your book. I'm in a hurry, these are three that I know are good for non comic readers, that I also happened to have images of handy. ***

Those of you not in the Georgia area and have no local comic shop with Arsenic Lullaby currently in stock, our Online store is open for the gift giving season!

ARSENIC LULLABY ONLINE STORE TEMPORARILY OPEN 10.00 off second print with coupon code- 2prints2

Onto the blog...

 Hugh Jackman, best known for his role as Wolverine to 50% of my readers, was in Milwaukee this week plugging a movie. A movie about a Neil Diamond impersonator, and as part of plugging it he was working behind the counter of a frozen custard shop. None of that is a typo.

And I'll tell you what this was...this was the perfect example of Milwaukee. Milwaukee is some twilight zone cross roads of all things awesome and super lame...with no rhyme or reason for any of it being here, coming here, or being from here, and no cohesion to anything whatsoever..

I'll give you an example. Milwaukee has a world class art museum. I mean WORLD CLASS. Famous works by Picasso, Georgia O'Keefe, Andy Warhol...the list goes on. Warhol's famous soup can paintings...they are here...

Fransico de Zurbaran's famous painting of St. Francis is here...

Some of the most important works from the modern age, the renaissance, the expressionist era, you name it, are here and if it's not here, it will probably come here at some point as part of a exhibition tour. Because the Milwaukee art museum is very prestigious.

And the building itself is an architectural wonder. Created by Spanish architect Santiago Calatrava and completed in 2001. Just look at this thing. It looks like it's out of the Jetsons.

A stones throw away from that wonder of modern architecture housing some of the most important works of art in the history of mankind, is a bronze statue of... Fonzie.

A character from a silly TV. show from the 70's. AND in case you are wondering...no the actor (Henry Winkler) is not from Milwaukee. The TV. show (which is fictional) was set in Milwaukee and that is enough to get a statue here, I guess. BUT the lame does not stop there because, rather than just leaving it bronze and having least that much class...they painted it.

If you were able to just look across the left shoulder of this eyesore...you could see they very building housing the 1903 paining "Waterloo Bridge" by Claude Monet.

You all know I'm no snob, what vexes me is what the F*ck are these two things doing next to each other?!

I do hate this statue, though. Every time there is some sort of riot here, I hope with all hope I can muster that it will be torn down or at least vandalized beyond repair. But no...for whatever reason, this city and even it's ne're do wells want this f*cking ridiculous thing to remain. As a tribute to...the city being mentioned on a stupid TV. show from 50 years ago.

How...is this still standing?! We have violent street gangs, biker gangs, antifa riots, the whole bit...

,,,but harming a statue of Fonzie is a bridge to far for all of them.

 I guarantee you could put up a statue of Gandhi, Buddha, the Pope, George Washington...Mother Teresa or any sacred cow or symbol of good and someone here would vandalize it, but f*cking Fonzie remains untouched.

During the whole metoo movement I was waiting...for someone to ding Henry Winkler. So they would yank this thing down in shame. oh please, oh please, oh please...nothing. Epstein list...nothing. I could wreck it myself but they'd just put up another one. Bigger and dumber looking. Maybe I could spot weld a hat from a confederate war general to him and then It'd get vandalized?

There ARE famous people from here that they COULD have made a cool statue of. Hell, Gene Wilder is from here...why not a Willy Wonka statue if you want something pop culture?! Willy Wonka was an option and they choose Fonzie.

Speaking of that, the list of people who are from here is a bewildering mess. The guy who invented the typewriter, Les Paul (maker of the Les Paul Guitar for all you non musicians), Liberace, a supreme court justice and Jeffery Dalmer are all from here...like, pick a lane.

One of the guys who developed the Apple computer is from here, and it's home to the prestigious Marquette University. In contrast with all that...at one point not that long ago Milwaukee had a f*cking muppet reading the weather report on the actual news. I'm not making that up. "Albert the Alley Cat" would read the weather...on an actual network, at 10pm.

And don't let this black and white ad fool you, this was not back in the day when television was new. This was going on well into the 80's.

"You know...The 80s was 40 years ago"

YOU SHUT YOUR FILTHY WORD HOLE.

 The point is, this was going on when the rest of markets in the country tried to present the news with professionalism and class, to maintain credibility with an audience. And this wasn't some ratings gimmick that came and went. This city put up with this for almost 20 YEARS.

While reading the weather is not THAT important, get your head around the entire situation here... This wasn't the "kids news" this was during the 10pm actual grown up, adult, news. Some anchor would tell viewers about the Iranian hostage crises, or other dire news and immediately after, this f*cking sock puppet would come on...

The Nixon impeachment, the Vietnam War, Reagan being shot, all stories that were read just before turning the news camera over to muppet.

It's not even a comforting looking puppet. It looks like it's about to ask me if it can borrow some money. I mean, look at that thing.  You know what this would be good for...If Sesame Street did one of those educational type episodes where they teach kids about not letting strangers touch them, it' be perfect for that...need a Muppet that looks like it would try to lure Elmo into a van? Here you go.

If Bert looked out his window and saw that thing, he'd move.

Aside from all of that, if you're going to just say f*ck it and not worry about dramatically shifting tone during a news cast, they could have at least gone the telemundo route...

"The U.S. has invaded Grenada, putting us that much closer to world war 3...and now the weather"

Ahh...bewbs...everything's going to be okay.

Going from hard news to a muppet doesn't make me feel like everything's going to be okay, it makes me feel like no one is in charge anywhere and we're all f*cked.

Children in Mexico would get the weather from some smoking hot Latina, we'd get it from this dead eyed, felt nightmare.

Anyways...that's Milwaukee. And that's why Hugh Jackman was here serving ice cream. It had the Milwaukee trifecta...awesome (Hugh Jackman) lame (a movie about a Neil Diamond impersonator) and nonsensical (serving ice cream to promote it). The three primary elements in constant struggle with each other in for dominance in the city of Milwaukee.

...one thing here that is not lame is Krampusnacht. A Krampus festival, where you can see ME this weekend. Krampus being the German anti Santa that steals naughty children. I'd call it comparable to a horror convention. The festival is basically...a big block party full of edgy weirdos. There's booze, live music, a parade,  and exhibitors, artists, authors of weird stuff (that'd be were you find me...or near the booze). and it's in a part of the city still full of cool old turn of the century (last century) buildings. AND...a personal perk for me, there will be no grown men dressed as Batman walking around.

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