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Tuesday, July 01, 2008 

6 am and beyond


So Monday morning 6 am rolls around and I'm drawing a cartoon of drowned children…life is good.  I decide to just push through and stay awake since I'm not going to get any sleep with the DPW guys trimming the trees on my street.  (for you locals …yes it is odd that they trimmed them AFTER hurricane winds went through) I make it to about 10;30 before i get drowsy... Drowsy and wired because I've been up for roughly two days and only ate peanuts  a frozen pizza and six energy drinks.   I have a craving for some chocolate milk so I wander to the gas station.

There is a big line because there is only one cashier and no one in this area has a drivers license because there is a bar on every block and they all have six DWI's and have to do their grocery shopping at the gas station because the grocery store is to far to walk.  –by the way…the neighborhood would be much safer with them all driving home at 2am with no one on the road, then them all drunk walking home vandalizing shit and shooting each other…

back to my story- the other cashier just got off and was hob knobbing with all the locals she is 55 and in shorts and a tube top.  There is a big difference between 55 in ....Hollywood.... and 55 in ....Wisconsin.....  55 in Hollywood is Jamie lee Curtis and heather Loclear…this is Wisconsin so she was basically George burns in a tube top.  She gets in line behind me with the biggest cup of coffee in the world and is chatting away…and standing WAY to close.  so close I could feel the vibrations from her raspy voice on my neck.  It felt like if I turned my head her nose would be in my ear.  maybe the lack of sleep and energy drinks were skewing my perspective…maybe I was a little more edgy than normal also I haven't had Any human contact since Thursday night.  In some ways caffeine is worse than speed. If you're on speed you know what's coming.  "am I acting frantic and wired and hyper? Yes of course I am, I'm on speed"  it's more grounding that being on caffeine and not knowing for sure …plus a little speed is probably more healthy that an ungodly amount of energy drinks.


ANYWAY I'm annoyed and curious so I decide to fake a sneeze and throw my head back…if she isn't right on my ass at least it'll back her off to a more comfortable distance.  Nope she was right on my ass and I bashed he right square in the nose with the back of my head.  She got a bloody nose. Which would have been funny but I got a hot cup of coffee down my back.  I still think I did the world a favor because she got blood on her "new" tube top and hopefully changed into something less horrifying.




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