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A WORD FROM OUR FOUNDER
who's fault is it your life sucks? PART ONE IN A SERIES
So, i mentioned in an earlier blog that the vast vast vast majority of people who get killed have it coming. this is just TRUE. the number of incidents where someone is randomly shot in the face for the money in his wallet is very small compared to the number of people who where in the wrong place at the wrong time because they put KNOWINGLY themselves in the wrong place at the wrong time- buying drugs, selling drugs, running with a dangerous crowd, butting heads with dangerous people, pissing off people you know you shouldn't be pissing off, working on the last nerve of someone who is borderline ready to snap until they are no longer border line, AND the ever popular love triangle.
but i don't want to talk about that because that is true period end of story. i ALSO mentioned that some women have it coming as far as abuse goes. not simply by driving their love interest nuts enough to beat the crap out of them although i feel many many cases of "abuse" are only considered abuse because we didn't get to live a week in the shoes of the guy who finally knocked his wife down the stairs...but MORE than that...they have is coming by going after, and staying with abusive pieces of shit. "nick" (who happens to be a cop) took great umbrage with that statement and went on to chastise me "no woman deserves getting burned with a cigarret, chocked with a phone cord, her face smashed in"..."ALL CASE I HAVE SEEN PERSONALLY"
FIRST off on a literal level...PLENTY of woman deserve that. there are plenty of horrible women out there who have that coming. how about the bitch who shot phil hartman? how about mansons "angels"? would nick say that manson's women who murdered a pregnant woman then ripped the fetus out didn't deserve AT LEAST getting their face smashed in? so lets lose the extreme terms like "no one" or "never".
...and you know whenever i'm really hard on a reader people jump all over me...look i've known Nick for years, he's a big boy and can dish it out and take it. so leave him out of this in a specific sense.
because what i'm REALLY talking about now is "having it coming" by putting themselves in the position to get abused. none of the cases he cited (cigarette burns, choking, face smashing) happened to those women on the first date. they hooked up with an abusive asshole...they probably had three dozens incidents that any normal person would walk away from before the serious physical abuse started. now i say... those women who hung around are dumb assholes who deserve it. Nick would say they don't. which one of our positions...if told to the abusie would help them more? hmmm? MINE! IF after every borderline abusive incident someone explained to the dumb broad who got choked with a phone cord "you are a dumb asshole who deserves to get the shit beat out of her if you go back to/stay with this piece of shit" there is a much better chance she MIGHT take a smart pill and leave.
but probably not because the sad truth is many abusies want the abuse. we've all seen this...the girl who jumps from one loser to the next loser...all of whom we say "she is too good for". we say that, but in truth she isn't. she is perfect for them. whether it's because she had a screwed up childhood, or crappy dad or whatever. she needs the drama, she needs the abuse, it's all she's comfortable with and she can't deal with someone who doesn't treat her like crap....her and the abuser are like the shark and the sucker fish that hangs on the shark and cleans it, a bizarre symbiotic relationship. abusies need/covet the abuse and all the sympathy in the world from people like nick, and all the abuse from the losers just helps feed their monkey. now...that is sad, and sick, and in a perfect world she would get help and get her head screwed on straight...but this isn't a perfect world .
so i would say that battered women by and large could be added to the list people "having it coming". just sure as if you skydive for fun and your chute fails, you mountain climb and get lost in the mountains, go ice fishing late in the season and fall through the ice...is staying with someone who is abusive and getting more and more abusive until you are eventually sitting in the hospital getting you jaw wired shut ANY DIFFERENT? i would say it's even MORE stupid because most of the time the guy who gets lost in the woods has no experience...he didn't get a little lost one time, then a little more another time, then a little more...and keep making excuses for the woods and saying that he knows the woods "loves him and didn't mean it" after each time he got lost in the same woods.
if you don't like the abuse leave. and don't give me that, or give THEM that shit about how strong you have to be to get out of one of those relationships...that's like saying you have to be strong to swim up from the bottom of a 20 yard deep lake of quicksand...START SWIMMING OUT OF IT THE SECOND YOU SEE YOURSELF SINKING...then you don't have to be strong at all. only an asshole would let themselves get sucked all the way to the bottom BEFORE starting to swim out. and sticking around with some dickhead until things are to the point of you getting choked with a phone cord is just as asinine.